Saturday, November 15, 2008

Hello -- or is it Oh Hell?


It's been a few days (maybe a couple weeks. I haven't looked). Life has been . . . interesting. I'm sure it's going to be wonderful, eventually, but right now it's a bit of a slog.

In the good news front, saw the cover of the new Mammoth Book of Paranormal Romance. It's beautiful! And it's got a lot of the biggest names in Paranormal Romance writing short stories in it. Which, of course, makes me nervous as hell that mine won't stack up. Ugh. Really ugh. Oh crap ugh. I mean, **I** like it, but well, um . . . crap.

The other day on my lunch hour a puppy (who should have been in a fence or on a lead, one of my big worries in this town since hardly anybody seems to bother and most of the dogs run loose) dashed under my moving truck. I hit him/her -- hard. I love animals (more than most people, which I probably shouldn't say, but there you go). She wasn't killed, but it wasn't good. She was rushed to the vet and had a broken front and back leg, one of which was going to require surgery and bolts. Because our vet was out of town, they had to take her to a vet in the larger city.

I felt and feel like CRAP. It wasn't my fault. But tell that to the pup. And the owners. And me a few more times. I mean I KNOW it wasn't my fault. But again, I feel like CRAP.

Another joyous event was a PHOTO SHOOT.

Okay, for those of you who look terrific, this doesn't sound so bad. For those of us who really REALLY don't look the way we'd like, (which actually is probably most people come to think of it) it's awful. Don is a great photographer. Don't get me wrong. But he can't change my weight, or my height or my "thyroid face and neck" (I have that lovely moonface and swollen neck thing going -- on top of the weight that we don't really want to discuss) or the fact that the camera is . . . well . . . accurate, damn it.

But we needed publicity shots of Cathy and I individually and together as a writing team. SOOOOOOO the morning was spent in front of the camera. The shots are as good as it gets for me in front of the camera. But it was not happytime. I am glad the results are good. And I am very, VERY glad it is over.

Also, I am a dinosaur. I accept this. Everyone who knows me accepts this. It is fine. BUT I had a mishap. Since I don't use a phone much, I only use a cell phone. Since I don't use the cell phone much, I use a Tracfone. One of those lovely buy your minutes and just use what you buy phones. I really like it too. Okay. I had a phone that was just that. A phone. Period. End of story. We even got it loaded for double minutes for the life of the phone and (WOOT) 800 minutes, which would last me a WHILE barring familial disasters (which eat telephone time). SO, I'm doing great. I have the minutes for all of WHOOO HOO, three whole days when I . . . wait for it . . . LOSE THE FRICKING PHONE.

Gone. Absolutely gone. Can't find it to save my life. Suspect some kid or teenybopper is now using it to call Taiwan or text their long lost boyfriend. (Or just threw it out in disgust because it's JUST a phone. [OHMIGAWD AN ANTIQUE!!!]) Whatever.

SO, I go to replace my phone and THEY DON'T EVEN MAKE THAT KIND ANY MORE. Nope. So, I get a phone that is a phone, a camera, can get me on the internet, and in all likelihood (assuming I could find the right button) tap dance and/or do the Macarena (which of course nobody does any more, but BY GOD my phone probably can). And the nice people at Tracfone replace the minutes, give me double minutes (came with the phone this time), and I get to keep my old phone number. BUT I have no idea how to use it. I mean, I'm learning. I'm literate. I can read directions. But JEEZ I keep hitting the @*#($& button that is supposed to link me to the internet (and going "NOOOOOOOOOOO stop it. I just want to make a CALL.")

I will learn. I have actually even successfully taken 1 picture. But this is not a good time for me.

SO, for those of you who know me. If you call and I do not answer, or you get cut off. Relax. I still like/love (depending and you know which category you fall into) you. It's just the freaking phone.


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