Wednesday Morning

HI!

Kandi -- thanks for the post! I have to tell you, I really needed the encouragement! Don't worry Tony and Sue are doing fine. ;)

My mind is still foggy. Trying to think creatively is like wading in quicksand. Every time I try I feel like I'm sinking fast. I'm hoping that when I'm off all the Rx I'll get back to normal. While I know that part of this is just post-book funk, and another part is being sick, it's really weird and a little scary for me not to have my mind racing along after some story or another.

I was thinking... always dangerous in my current frame of mind. But I remember a girl from my neighborhood when I was a kid. Whenever we played games, if she started to lose she'd change the rules. I think one of the reasons I've been so frustrated is that the same thing happens in adulthood. Every time you start to get a grip, somebody moves the bar.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm a big believer in progress. But changing the job description without changing the money just sucks. (That's metaphorically, not literally about my day job). If they keep moving the finish line, you never get to celebrate a victory. I'm the type that I NEED those celebrations to motivate me to push to the next level. I also need the occasional REST.

Once upon a time, back in the dark ages when God was a baby and dirt was new you were allowed a bit of a slower pace. When you weren't at work you were OFF (GASP). You weren't expected to have a phone with you at all times, check your voicemail, email, and everything from home. Turn around time for a project was measured in weeks or (if urgent) days rather than MINUTES. I love technology, but the fax machine and e-mail have made people have amazingly unreasonable expectations of how much you're supposed to get done how fast. And the stress is killing us. Stress eating, obesity, lack of down time to do things that might qualify as exercise. More and more people are adrenaline junkies. They can't BEAR NOT TO BE HOOKED UP AND A PART OF THINGS. Keep moving. Gotta run.

I'm POOPED. I hereby announce to all and sundry that I am going to try not to play that game regardless of their expectations. Wish me luck with that.