Tuesday, November 30, 2004

I have a question.

I have a question. When did "nice" become a perjorative? You say someone is "nice" and people think you are "damning them with faint praise." It makes them sound weak, and in certain cases ugly (or at very least homely) and not terribly bright.

Example: You're trying to set someone up with your friend on a blind date. You say that she is "A nice girl with a great sense of humor." The man is practically guaranteed to run for the hills. Now both of those things are GOOD, or should be. But I doubt you'd describe Catherine Zeta Jones or Claudia Schiffer in those terms even if it's true. (It may well be accurate -- or not. I wouldn't know, haven't met the ladies in question). And then there's that old standby "Nice guys finish last." Say's who? Why? And if so, is it a BAD thing? I mean, if you finish first by cheating and being an asshole, is it good that you did. If it takes being a complete asshole to finish first should you want to?

So, when did nice become "Too Donna Reed for prime time"?


Anonymous said...

First off, Donna Reed is awesome (so was June Kleever and Timmy's Mom from "Lassie"). Second, I think it depends on how or who says "she's a nice girl...." as some people are pretty shallow about things and they reflect that in the way they speak. Next off, (in my opinion), we live in a very shallow culture/society (but, so do some people in other countries), our culture/society is GREATLY affected by the media and advertising. Advertising can build major insecurities in people, creating an underlying tone of "if you buy this fragrance or these cosmetics you'll look like this" (which is a pile of crap, as we HOPEFULLY all know). Do "nice guys really finish last?" I think not, as I believe in "karma," so if someone isn't nice, everyone knows it, people might not say anything to him/her about it, but people know it, and it will affect the way he/she ultimately goes through life. If someone goes running because they are told before a blind date that someone is "nice" well, that sure doesn't say too much about the person that went running, except that they are shallow (and rude, and who the heck needs them anyway?). Also, as far as "homely" goes that means nothing, beauty is so different for everyone, it can also be cultural, everyone sees it differently, one person can see beauty as height, another as hair color, another as an accent, yadda, yadda, yadda. Put 100 women from 100 countries on a stage, and 100 men from 100 different countries voting on who's the most beautiful in the audience, you won't get a concensus. Our curse is that we can tend to live in a shallow culture/society (like remember the football players and cheerleaders from High School? Well, I do, as I helped a lot of them with their homework, ha, ha). To a person who has a Friend that has always been there for them and that Friend becomes disfigured by say throat cancer (like one of my best Friends was), that person is still the most beautiful person to the other, no matter what. Most people's Parents are always beautitul to them, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and as a society, I believe that we should have little to no tolerance for "shallow people" as they don't help.

Anonymous said...

One more thing to think about: Do I want to see "pretty" people in movies? No, I want to see people who can act! Give me people who can act! I respect wtriters and artists much more than actors, they have vision, directors do too. And personally, I am watching more and more foreign and independant films these days.

Anonymous said...

Oh, boy am I bad today, o.k., one more thought: Let's put the blame on the person who "set-up" the blind date in the first place, they should have said "I have someone I think you should meet, see what you think and if anything develops (and even if you become friends), I think it would be awesome for you both" (or something like that keeping the "shallow" nature of it out). O.k., I'll shut up now.